I have a lot of drama in my life right now.
At work. At the trailer. At home.
And you know what? It’s really pissing me off.
Before menopause I was a pushover. I didn’t have clear boundaries. I let people walk all over me.
Now I don’t put up with anyone’s shit.
Before menopause if two people were fighting I would try to help them work through it. At work I would take up the slack and not say a word. I was glad I could help.
Now if two people are fighting I tell them to work it and walk away. I’m not getting involved especially if its over something stupid.
At work I treat people like they treat me. If theyleave the copier without any paper they can expect the same thing when theu come in. I don’t pick up the slack anymore. I don’t do what needs to be done. I don’t go the extra mile.
I’m getting to old to keep being “nice”.
The last couple weeks have been trying.
I just don’t give a shit like I used to.
Is that bad?
Am a bad person if I’m starting to put myself first?
I dont think so. I think its about damn time.
I dont want my life to be about them and their problems. Their anger. Their fears and lack of self confidence.
I want my life to be about me and what I want and need.
I want my life to be calm and happy. I want be loved and respected.
I want to have healthy boundaries and have people respect them.
I’m 56. I’m beginning to realize that I’m not going to live forever.
The time I have left is precious. It’s mine and I should be able to live it the way I want to.
I’m starting to get to know myself better on a deeper level. I’m starting to love myself in a way I never have before. I’m cutting myself some slack and taking risks.
I’m becoming the person I’ve always wanted to be.
Not everyone likes it and that’s ok.
I’m done living with other people’s drama.
Thanks for listening to me rant.